Expectant Dads to be

What you need to know when you are about to become a Dad

Overcoming fears and assumptions is part of becoming a father.

Expectant fathers go through profound changes also, even though their bodies don’t change. Even though fathers don’t experience morning sickness, weight gain, the pain of childbirth and other physical discomforts of carrying a baby, the effects of becoming a father cannot be underestimated.

Frequently men have difficulty talking about their concerns or how they are coping. Sometimes men feel left out and sometimes they just don’t know what to do.

During pregnancy, together you can follow a week by week information guide to understand what is happening to your partner and the different developmental stages your baby is at.

Towards the end of pregnancy your partner might feel more tired and anxious, encourage her to talk about her concerns, if you learn to support each other now, your relationship will be stronger when the baby arrives.

If you don’t already help around the house now is the time to do so. For example cooking and food shopping.

A new baby means new responsibilities.

The first pregnancy is a very important event, it will change your life and change can be frightening even if it is something you have been looking forward to.

One of the best ways to support your partner is to prepare for labour together:

Be able to recognise the signs of labour

Know how to time a contraction, make sure your watch has a second hand and time your partner’s contraction from the beginning of one contraction to the beginning of the next contraction. Count the frequency of the contractions in minutes.

Don’t rush to the hospital too early and do anything to help your partner take her mind off the contractions.

Know what to expect during labour, don’t expect labour to be over in a few hours. Every woman’s experience is different but it is very helpful to understand the 3 stages of labour.

Get involved

In the days and weeks before the baby’s due date make sure both of you are packed for hospital, go through your check list when packing your bags.

During labour The midwife is there to make sure your partner and baby are doing well during labour and birth but you have a big role in supporting your partner and communicating her wishes.

Know what her wishes are

Listen to your partner, she may like massage but it is difficult to know in advance, provide continuous reassurance telling her how well she is doing through every stage.

Cutting the cord

If you plan to cut the cord don’t be shy on the day remind your partner and midwife of your wishes.

Seeing your baby

Seeing your baby coming into the world is the most amazing experience.

You may feel nervous handling your baby but don’t be nervous, hold your baby close to your chest.

You may cry because it is very emotional.

You may find it difficult to sleep when you go home after such an intense exciting experience, but please get sleep because when baby comes home there will be plenty of sleepless nights.

Taking your family home

When baby comes home it is important to take some time off work to help with cooking, bathing baby, changing nappies and taking baby out for a walk in the pram while your partner takes some rest. Use this time to get to know your baby, and try to keep visitors to a minimum in the early days, because visitors mean well but can be exhausting.

Some mothers get depressed after child birth and need a lot of support.

Make sure you are aware of the signs of post natal depression and where to get help.

You may also feel down as this is a huge change in your life as well and you also need support.

Keep talking and listening to each other, support each other and remember becoming parents is an wonderful time in your lives.